Saturday 12th May
Wow what an incredible 7 days. This time last week I went to bed with the idea and plan to travel to Gatwick airport the next morning, find the cheapest flight outside of Europe that was hot and sunny, and book a one-way ticket. I have been day dreaming about travelling for so long now, and I have come to the realisation that there will always be a reason NOT to go - a commitment with a friend, a family event or birthday, business, the desire to invest money in something with a financial return, the fear of it negatively impacting my life and business back home…the list goes on.
I felt like I was stuck in a rut, trapped by my own mind and self-imposed boundaries. The more success I had in business, the more relationships I built, the more plans I made, the harder and harder it became to follow my heart. My mind would calculate the various possibilities to try and predict the outcome of my choices. It became exhausting.
The voice of my heart and soul would pop up every now and then in moments of clarity. It would scream “Go travelling!”, but then I would tell myself that it is me trying to escape reality, and instead I should focus on building my business and life back home.
I remember writing in my journal and finally accepting that it is my truth, my heart’s desire to explore and have adventure. My minds response was operating somewhere in the background, calculative with doubt and fear. My final sentence in that day’s journal was “Will I have the strength to go travelling? Should I go now or raise investment first?”
I knew deep down that I should travel first, but the attraction to raising investment and scaling MyOfficeMove was still there. In reality, raising investment and then going travelling would never have worked. Once you raise investment you basically become an employee of your own company, with expectations and defined boundaries. It wasn’t that clear to me at the time, and business was progressing nicely. I had just finished an interview podcast with Bert Broadhead from Building Our Future and a 3,000-5,000 sq. ft. office move made an enquiry via an organic search on google. If MOM continued growing at this rate, then it would be some years until I could spontaneously disappear without consequence. Anything could happen! So, with this in mind I made my choice to begin an adventure the most spontaneous way I could. At 1030am on Saturday 5thMay I would go to the airport and choose a flight based on the criteria aforesaid mentioned.
There was still doubt in my mind. I realised that I should let my family and friends know, including Shervin the CTO of MOM. Each phone call triggered me. “Why are you going?” they would ask, and each time my answer would be different; “Because there will always be a reason not to”. “Because if I don’t go now I may never be able to”. “Because it has been a burning desire for so long”. “Because I am building a future that I don’t like and need to re-evaluate”. Each answer would surprise me. When you follow your intuition and listen to your heart, you do not consider the logical and rational reasons produced by the mind. As I shared my reasons, I was hearing them for the first time. It would create more questions inside of me, adding more doubt and confusion. Then, as time passed I would think of more reasons not to go. The LOOP I was stuck on was starting again, the only difference is that this time I was not going to listen to my mind, I was following my heart.
I woke up at 7am on Saturday and the program I have created for myself (my daily ritual) kicked in automatically. I checked my vision board, said my mantra, read 10 pages of a book ‘The Power of Intention’ by Dr Wayne Dyer and journaled while eating a healthy breakfast. I prepared the clothes I was going to take with me the night before, but I didn’t have a proper travel bag. I decided to deviate from my ritual and visit the town centre to buy a bag. A part of me also wanted to buy a new iPhone so I could take better pictures – I was still using my 6S with a cracked camera lens. I tried but didn’t have enough time. I raced back and hit the gym at 9.45am. I was cutting it fine and felt rushed.
It was a beautiful sunny day in England and I started wondering WHY I was rushing - I could go to the airport anytime! Despite this I wanted to stick to the plan for two reasons’
I am practicing ‘being my word’, which means I always do what I say.
If I didn’t stick to the plan I may lose touch with my heart’s desire and let the mind take over, creating a reason strong enough to forget the trip altogether.
After giving myself these reasons I paused for a moment. I had an insight to what I would later come to understand and know more of during my travels. I was letting the past and future control my present moment. I let the past go, I stopped thinking about the future and asked myself “Do I want to be on a plane all day or do I want to be in the sunshine?”. The answer was sunshine, so I finished my work out, went home to say goodbye to my Mum, and called Jannah to ask if she fancied going out for the day on the Harley Davidson.
TO BE CONTINUED.